What is bullying?
‘The repetitive, intentional hurting of one person or group by another person or group, where the relationship involves an imbalance of power. Bullying can be physical, verbal or psychological. It can happen face-to-face or through cyberspace.’
In simple terms this means that bullying is: behaviour which is meant to cause upset. Is done on purpose and occurs more than once. It is normally done by someone who is in a stronger position – maybe because they are more popular, they are older, they are stronger, to someone in a weaker position.
More than one time on purpose is an easy way to remember what bullying is.
Selston High School use the above definition of bullying which comes from the Anti-bullying Alliance – a charity which works with schools to reduce bullying and its impact in schools.
Find out more about the work of the Anti-bullying alliance here:
Cyber bullying can involve unpleasant or threatening texts, unpleasant images or memes being circulated, gossip and rumours being spread via social media, websites being set up etc. Even if this happens out of school the school will do everything they can to support you.
Bullying is not the same as falling out with a friend or a one off unpleasant incident unless this is very serious in nature.
If you have had a fall out or someone has been unpleasant to you but it doesn’t fit the definition of bullying report the behaviour and school will try to support you.
Top Tips for Young People if you or someone you know is being bullied
Be an outstander not a bystander. If you are being bullied know your rights and report it. We can help. If someone else is being bullied stand up for them by either intervening at the time if it is safe for you to do so or by reporting it to someone who can help
Don’t blame yourself – it doesn’t matter what colour hair you have, how you speak, how you walk, how you talk, it is not your fault if you get bullied. We are all different in some way and that is what makes us amazing!
It is okay to be upset about it – the important thing is you tell someone about it. Talk to someone you trust: a teacher, a parent/carer, a sibling or a friend. If you don’t want to do that you can call Childline on 0800 11 11 or visit www.childline.org.uk
Keep a record of what happened, when it happened and who was involved. If the bullying is on line, keep the evidence – save or copy any photos, videos, texts, e mails or posts. Screen shot and save and report.
Block or unfriend anyone who is being unpleasant to you on line.
Do not retaliate. Sometimes adults may tell you to do this but it is likely to either make the problem worse or get you in trouble. It can be tempting to send a horrible message back or to fight back but this is not a good idea.
Think about other ways you can respond to bullying. For example practice saying “I don’t like it when you say that/do that – please stop.” Enlist the help of friends and ask them to be outstanders and help you.
Only hang out with people who make you feel good about yourself. If someone puts you down they are not a friend and not worth your time however cool and popular they are.
Be kind to yourself. Do things that make you feel good, relax and make new friends. You might plan an instrument, write lyrics, draw cartoons, dance, act or join a sports club. It is your life so make it the best life possible. Having friends outside of school or the area the bullying takes places is a good protective mechanism
Be kind and respectful to everybody. Model the behaviour you would like to see and treat others how you wish to be treated. Be an outstander if you witness any bullying. Just because someone is different to you that doesn’t mean you are better than them or you have the right to make them feel bad.
How to report bullying
There are a number of ways you can report bullying to the school.
In person –speak to your tutor, Head of Year or go to the SSC before school, at break or lunchtime or after the school day.
In the bullying drop box – a note, anonymous or named can be put in the anti-bullying drop box under the TV screen near room 16
Send a text to the following number: 01773 252012 Please note this is not monitored 24 hours a day but only during school hours
By email – send an email to your tutor, the SSC or Head of Year of Nigel Bailey the anti-bullying coordinator – this can sometimes be easier than talking to someone in the first instance
Via your parents – they can get in touch with any member of staff at school to report the issue
Click on the button below to send an email to the SSC who will read it between the hours of 8am-3.30 on any school day.